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Dr Phil lyrics

I m lying here on your couch feeling lousy
My life s a great big mess
I m crying here and all you ve done
Is perscribe me lots of drugs
I can t stay on your Prozac
Cause it s making me itch
I can t stay on your Zoloft
Cause it s making me twitch
I said I m sick of all this medicine
So just stuff your little pitch
I found an alternative
Cause yesterday
I turned on the tube
And some bald headed dude
Started telling me what to do
And I swear
I don t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
My eyes are glued to the screen as he lectures me
He tells me to get a grip
And all of the other shows they were different
Maybe Dr. Phil can help
I can t stand my lifestyle
Cause it s making me fat
I m afraid to make commitments
Tell me what is up with that
I trying to potty train my kid again
But he s being a little brat
I think I ll write in today
Cause he cares
That I had an affair
And that I m losing my hair
And that life can be so unfair
And I swear
I don t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
He knows
That I m watching his show
And that my job really blows
And that I like wearing pantyhose
And I swear
I don t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
My friends think I m a mama s boy
But I tend to disagree
I m still living with my parents
And I m turning forty-three
I said I need to wash my hands again
Cause I m feeling OCD
I think I ll write in today
Cause he s the man
With the seven step plan
And I m his biggest fan
He s my Shady and I m his Stan
And I swear
I don t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
He says
I need to get real
I need to get smart
I need to get going here
And I swear
I don t need your pills
Just give me some cable
And let me watch Dr. Phil
I need Dr. Phil
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